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Ridicule is something we all expected to ditch once we left the playgrounds as children. Adults seemed smarter, more mature, less likely to judge others prematurely. How wrong we were. Teasing and derision are still very much alive and kicking in the world. But if you are experiencing this type of jeering, be it in a social or professional setting, you can turn this negative into a positive if you can keep yourself centered and calm. A state of full-consciousness is the only way to counteract derision and mockery because they cannot stand in the presence of true, stable commitment.

You Tease What You Fear

Ridicule is born out of fear. It is a product of the ego’s fear of annihilation and we are all guilty of it. It is the unconscious reaction to anyone who we feel is closer to success than we are, or who threatens our view of the world. We judge others when we are stuck in the unconscious mode of needing to be, or knowing what is, “right”. Look around and watch for these types of judgmental actions. You might be surprised how often they crop up not only in others, but in yourself.

When we ridicule someone, be it out loud mockery, complaining or silent scorn, we are doing so out of our own insecurity and fear. That co-worker you can’t stand, annoys you only because you are afraid that he will succeed before you do. It doesn’t matter how annoying that person may be, your scorn has nothing to do with their actions and everything to do with your fear that someone who is “inferior” will be found to be “better” than you.

When we scorn those we do not personally know, it is less out of fear of failure and more out of fear of being “wrong.” This is especially true in the world of science. Research scientists in the field of quantum physics have long had to endure the derision of skeptics who were afraid of being wrong and having to admit that there might indeed be something they did not yet know or understand.

A Ridiculed Discovery in Quantum Physics

In the late 70’s and into the 80′S German biophysicist, Fritz Popp, discovered that cells in living things communicated through fluctuations in the quantum field via what he termed “biophoton emissions.” In other words, light! He found that even humans produced photons of light depending on fluctuations in energy in the Zero Point Field. This, he theorized was the how schools of fish could change direction at blazing speeds and all instantaneously. This is how birds could migrate and navigate together and even how the cells of our bodies could perform millions of operations all at once. His research even lead him to the discovery that illness interrupted the flow of this communication between the cells, hinting that if the flow could be restored, so could perfect health.

By all means, this should have been the discovery of the century. What it earned Popp however was ridicule, the loss of his job and an attempted seizing of his research equipment. Popp managed to spare his equipment, but found himself on the outskirts of the scientific community, laughed at and scorned, though he had vigorously tested and reproduced his findings.

It would take years before Fritz would be backed up by others, vindicated and welcomed back into the scientific community. The ending was a happy one in this case, but the world very nearly missed out on an incredible discovery because Popp’s colleagues feared that he had stumbled onto something unknown. They assumed that if no one else had discovered this, there must be nothing to discover. They feared his findings might nullify everything they had ever written on the subject of cellular biology. They fought against him out of fear and very nearly won.

It is frightening at times how little adults have grown away from their more childish tendencies. If anything we’ve gotten smarter and far more dangerous.

Focusing Teasing Into Creation

If you are experiencing such mockery and derision, know that there is something you can do about it. You cannot control the thoughts, feelings and actions of others, but you can control how they affect your life.

First off, realize that if ridicule is coming into your life there is probably a very good reason. You are being viewed as somehow dangerous. No one picks on the town drunk, because he is no threat to them. Everyone assumes he is a harmless failure. We mock those who appear somehow threatening to our pride, our careers or our health. The dumb scorn the smart, the inept scorn the talented and the weak scorn the strong. It is hardly ever the other way around, that is to say the talented do not scorn the inept unless they are unsure of that ineptness.

Ridicule only goes up the “social food chain.”

Teasing is like a social barometer, the more you are derided, the more likely you are to be on the right track. If you want to turn this mockery into a positive force then start realizing that it is social confirmation for you. The more others ridicule you, the more likely it is that you are heading in the right direction and should keep going. If you were truly heading toward failure, no one would bother with you, it wouldn’t seem worth it. Their fear, however, is proof that you are doing something right. So grow a thick skin and stick to your guns. The Universe evens all things out in the end.

Live Through Principles

If you want to focus your ridicule into a creative force, you must be careful not to fall into the same unconscious trap that your opposition have encountered. You must not lapse into fear or you will find yourself defeated by their jibes. If you can stay your course and live through your principles you will find success.

The difference lies in your motivation. Operating out of fear will create doubts that will torment you. They will whisper that perhaps the opposition is right, you are a failure. You’re making a terrible mistake that you’ll never be able to take back. It will ruin your life. Fear will always exaggerate, be watchful for such tactics. It will blow failure out of all reasonable proportion until it becomes unduly terrifying.

Choosing to operate out of principle is not easy. It requires constant vigilance of your own mind. It requires that you stay conscious for as much of the day as you can manage, especially when confronting ridicule. Stay focused on what is right and true for you and you will not waiver; lapse into doubt and fear and you will fail for certain. Your principles act as the rudder for your ship, choosing whether to take you left, right or straight on. They help you choose a course that is not based on your ego and its fear of failure, but out of your higher consciousness that knows your true abilities.

If you wish to stay your course you must find your principles. Find your values. Find what you would stand up for and what you would die for. Once you have found them, turn to them for every decision and every moment of doubt.

Fritz Popp chose not to give into pressure when others told him his findings were wrong and his method was questionable. Fritz knew that his method was accurate and so were his findings. He was certain that his findings had opened a door that the world needed to step through. The threat of never again having a career was not enough to sway him. The work was simply too important. The work, the principles of science, had to come first. There was simply no other way.

Ridicule is a Sign Post

Ridicule is actually quite useful when you step back and look at it objectively. Certainly it is uncomfortable and often demoralizing, but it is also a sign post to success. If someone finds you so threatening as to take the time and energy to ridicule you, you must be doing something right. Unconscious humans tend toward laziness and wouldn’t bother with you unless you were really doing something that made waves in their little worlds.

View scorn and mockery as a sign post on the road to success. If at any point the opposition should cease their snide behavior, you should begin to wonder whether or not you are still on the right track. As the old saying goes, you can’t make an omelet without breaking a fews eggs. Seek to view teasing and ridicule in the same way. Use it as the social barometer for your life and your work.

If they care enough about you to make fun of you, you must be very important indeed.

“The story of Ivan Ilych’s life was of the simplest, most ordinary and therefore most terrible.”
–Leo Tolstoy

I do not believe that anyone has ever risen with the bright morning sun, stretched beneath their soft warm blankets and said to themselves, “My God, I hope this day is as dull as they come!” I can’t quite grasp that anyone could be so complacent as to view this wide world as “the hand they were dealt” and to continue playing such a dull game of cards. The quote above by Leo Tolstoy just seems to say it all, doesn’t it? It says that a life defined as ordinary is a life of the most terrible nature. If that seems strange to you, I would ask you this: are you one of those who feels that life is just a game of chance you have already lost?

The ordinary life can come in many guises and is hard to recognize by those on the outside. If however, you live one every day, I do not need to point out what it feels like or how you know. You just know. You feel in your bones that there is more to you and more to life than you have ever felt or seen. You may also feel that these desires are beyond you, that you could never achieve them. You may feel you are too old, too young, too fat, too thin; there are always a million reasons not to do something. You simply feel that your desires are not a good use of your time and that you should be doing something “useful.”

Stop Trying to Be Useful.

I hate that word, useful. It implies that you could ever do or be something that serves no purpose at all. But how could this ever be? How could you never serve some sort of purpose in the greater scheme of the world? This world and this universe are nothing if they are not purposeful. They work by laws that are unerring and undeniable. Things that go up always come down, opposites always attract. There are reasons and rhymes and there always have been. So how could it be that you or anyone else living and creating within this universe could act in a way that wasn’t of some use?

It will serve you greatly in the future if you realize that everything has its purpose. Not some things, not most things. All things. Perhaps you feel alone, or helpless, or that life is something you are trapped underneath. All of these are warning signs and all of the desires and the dreams that you are denying on a daily basis are the very things that exist to save you from yourself. If you do not accept this fact, you are not yet ready to move on. Your dreams and your desires are the cavalry that are coming to your rescue. To deny them or ignore them is to choose one more minute and one more day in this ordinary and most terrible life.

The NEED for the Material

We ignore them because our wants and our needs have been corrupted by the ego and the self-help community in conjunction. So many books tell you that wanting something more than you have only supports a mind-set of lack. What they meant to say is that the wanting of more MATERIAL THINGS supports a mind-set of lack. Your desires are meant to point you toward the betterment of yourself and your life, but more often than not they point you toward the nearest shiny new toy. Why, because your ego’s fear has stepped in the way. Your true desire is to change your life and begin to operate in a new way. Your ego sees failure written all over that idea and heads it off at the pass. “You don’t want a new job,” it says. “Too risky. Might not work out. You just need a bigger TV. That’ll make you feel better.” But it never does. Your desire for material things is not born from a desire to better your life, but from the need to distract yourself from real improvement.

The things themselves aren’t evil and neither is wanting them. What is detrimental to you is your obsession with material things and the putting of these things before your true urges. Material possessions need to be kept in their place. See them for what they really are: toys to be played with and discarded. They hold no more importance than that. Play with them while you have them and want for nothing more than you have in this moment.

Our true desires involve not the gaining of something new or something we never had, but the betterment of what we already posses. They raise us up and make us feel like more than we ever dreamed we could be. The desires of the ego feel like lack. They make us feel as if we are one step behind in keeping up with the Joneses.

Finding Your Flow

When you feel the pull of true desire there will be no mistaking it. You will feel a rush, a surge of energy. You won’t feel like sleeping, you’ll barely think of eating. It is a frenzied kind of creation that will make you feel electric. It will wash away the old feelings of despair and neglect and replace them with confidence and unwavering focus. You will feel, in a word, inspired.

Many spiritual teachers have written and spoken about the flow of energy through our bodies and that cutting off that energy is what leads to things like lack and unhappiness. I don’t know about that, I’ve never seen this energy and have never seen it blocked, but I think the idea is essentially correct. Rather than your ordinary life being caused by some blockage of energy, it occurs when you block yourself. If we could get you out of your own way, you would experience a world that was entirely new and far more interesting.

When I was a fresh-faced theater student, my mentor used to give me private lessons in Alexander Technique. This involved bringing your awareness to your body and allowing yourself to release unneeded tension. The main point of Alexander Technique is to get out of your body’s way. Your body, when left to its own devices, will return itself to its natural state of balance poise and equilibrium. Most people are so cut off from their own kinesthetic awareness that we have back, neck and many other physicals maladies. Believe me, once you get into AT, you look around at everyone around you, and down at yourself, to realize we’re all just getting in our own way every minute of the day.

It is when you get out of your own way that you get into what we call “the flow” or “the groove” or “the zone.” You feel as if that energy that was blocked is now flowing freely. You feel as if you could conquer the world and indeed, you could. This you see is what the world feels like when you are not twisting yourself into an ordinary wreck. Instead of looking at your desires as things that are meant for others but never for you, you will begin to realize that your natural state is that of the creator. You will no longer stand in your own way when it comes to the successes in your life. You will learn to step back and allow your natural processes to take you to a life less ordinary. From here you will create miracles that will dazzle others but you will know that what you do is the simplest and easiest thing the world.

I encourage you to tap into your playful side when you feel that you life is becoming stagnant. Your desire for change doesn’t need to be earth-shaking in it profundity. It simply needs to be allowed to flow freely through you. This desire might be to drive the scenic route home from work. This isn’t exactly ground-breaking, but it is a new and exciting experience. If you give into it in a playful manner you will discover the magic that lives in that moment. If, however, you keep your focus on how little time you have today and all that important work that awaits you, you will stay grounded in the ordinary.

Return to that bliss you felt as a child when everything seemed to have some mystical importance. You looked at an empty box and saw nothing but its possibilities. It is this type of playfulness that you must reconnect with. Take the seriousness out of life and have more fun with it. Let go of your ego’s need to be DOING something. Release yourself from the DOING of things and learn to connect with the BEING of things. Do your laundry in a deliberate way or feel the tiny movements in your arms as you drive. This is the being of an action. It is the playful acceptance of a task. Return to this sense of wonder and magic and release your need for seriousness. Life was never serious, that was a lie your parents told you. You came into this world screaming and naked, why so serious?

The key to changing a seemingly ordinary existence into a fulfilled and magical one is a shift in how you approach the world. If you learn to approach your tasks with acceptance and fun, you will create magic. If you learn to approach your desires with dedication and step out of your own way, you will find that doors for change open for you where you never expected. You will find help where you never dreamed it could appear.

The universe will begin to work with you, just as soon as you begin to work for yourself.